hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
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When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
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It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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