She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
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Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
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