I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
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