well you can't waste a boner
I wish i was in the wii world.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Randomize
