New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
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ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
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I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
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