What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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