the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Randomize
