Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize
