called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
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If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
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hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Don't tell me you're on acid again