im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
it glows. i had to have it.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Shame is for Republicans.
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