So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
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I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
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He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way