No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
