Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
