the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize