Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
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