Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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