We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize