i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize
