p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Rumble strips road head = magical
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
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