Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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