how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
high people should be assigned attendants
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
