Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
