you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
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