I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Randomize
