Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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