Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
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