he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Randomize
