How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
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