Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize