I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
