Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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