Grow some girl-balls and come out already
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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