Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
too bad you live with your parents still
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
