based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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