It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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