Whod you bang
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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