Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
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