i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
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