You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Randomize
