people are starting to question the shark bite story
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Randomize
