He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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