Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
operation have a gay friend backfired
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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