She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
