she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
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