I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
