so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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