good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
