Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
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