you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize