Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
