You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Randomize
